Tumblr used to be so easy, so simple.
No it wasn't.
Remember when we had to go to a whole new page just to post or reblog something
Remember when the reblog button was at the top of posts so you had to scroll back up to interact with it
whenever my program freezes
this is going around twitter rn but im also super curious: please tell me your top four comfort movies that you’re always down to watch bc my friend thinks mine are ridiculous and now we’ve realised everyone’s version of “comfort” is hilariously different
is this even funny i dont think its funny im not putting it in the tags
How has this comic made such a groundbreaking cultural impact without getting over 40k notes
Apparently neopets not only managed to ditch the NFT bros, but with the closure of the Jumpstart brand weeks ago, neopets is now completely independent for the first time since the early 2000′s, got millions in a new investment deal and are currently installing a flash simulator so that all their games and animations work again.
btw since the rwrb movie is obviously gonna be bringing in a lot of new fans, here’s a little heads up for those who are unaware:
casey mcquiston, the author of red white & royal blue, uses they/them pronouns and is not a woman!
that’s all, have a nice day (:
This is literally me when my gf starts talking about stocks:
Holy shit he’s back
Last week I accidentally took an edible at 10x my usual dose. I say “accidentally” but it was really more of a “my friend held it out to my face and I impulsively swallowed it like a python”, which was technically on purpose but still an accident in that my squamate instincts acted faster than my ability to assess the situation and ask myself if I really wanted to get Atreides high or not.
Anyway. I was painting the wall when it hit. My friend heard me make a noise and asked what was wrong—I explained that I had just fallen through several portals. I realized that painting the wall fulfilled my entire hierarchy of needs, and was absolutely sure that I was on track to escaping the cycle of samsara if I just kept at it a little longer. I was thwarted on my journey towards nirvana only by the fact that I ran out of paint.
Seeking a surrogate act of humble service through which I might be redeemed and made human, I turned to unwashed dishes in the sink and took up the holy weapon of the sponge. I was partway through cleaning the blender when it REALLY hit.
You ever clean a blender? It’s a shockingly intimate act. They are complex tools. One of the most complicated denizens of the kitchen. Glass and steel and rubber and plastic. Fuck! They’ve got gaskets. You can’t just scrub ‘em and rinse them down like any other piece of shit dish. You’ve got to dissemble them piece by piece, groove by sensitive groove, taking care to lavish the spinning blades with cautious attention. There’s something sensual about it. Something strangely vulnerable.
As I stood there, turning the pieces over in my hands, I thought about all the things we ask of blenders. They don’t have an easy job. They are hard laborers taking on a thankless task. I have used them so roughly in my haste for high-density smoothies, pushing them to their limits and occasionally breaking them. I remembered the smell of acrid smoke and decaying rubber that filled the kitchen in the break room the last time I tried to make a smoothie at work—the motor overtaxed and melted, the gasket cracked and brittle. Strawberry slurry leaked out of it like the blood of a slain animal.
Was this blender built to last? Or was it doomed to an early grave in some distant landfill by the genetic disorder of planned obsolescence? I didn’t know, and was far too high to make an educated guess. But I knew that whatever care and tenderness and empathy I put into it, the more respect for the partnership of man and machine, the better it would perform for me.
This thought filled me with a surge of affection. However long its lifespan, I wanted it to be filled with dignity and love and understanding. I thought: I bet no one has hugged this blender before. And so I lifted it from its base.
A blender is roughly the size and shape of a human baby. Cradling one in your arms satisfies a primal need. A month ago I was permitted to hold an infant for the first time in my life, an experience which was physically and psychologically healing. I felt an echo of that satisfaction holding my friend the blender, and the thought of parting with it felt even more ridiculous than bringing it with me to hang out on my friend’s bed.
frightbot:
after inputting some complex algorithms into my super computer i’ve determined what tumblr will look like in the year 2020
i love how this comes back after every shitty update staff makes
All these people on this website are so cool and diverse I love being here but I wish I could meet you all in person
There should be a tumblr convention
What a fun idea! There could even be an indoor playground... Maybe with a ball pit or something.....
Time is a circle we are always doomed to repeat it whether we learn the error of our ways or not
I mean, the world is set on a course to repeat things much worse than dashcon anyway, so we might as well
If dashcon 2024 is the light in the darkness of this harsh world. Then we are surly headed down a grim path
dashcon 2024 is a beacon of hope in our dark, hopeless reality. unfortunately that beacon belongs to an anglerfish
I swear to god if this post breaches containment and inadvertently unleashes the fresh hell that is dashcon 2024 upon us. It will be the end of days
fuck yeah daschon 2024!!!!!!!!!!
Don't call it dashcon 2024, call it dashcon 2015. It's important.
If this post reaches 100,000 notes, OP *has* to organize a Tumblr con! Let's get it up there!
I’m 19 and I do not have the money or time to do such a thing
Yes, that will make it Authentic!
What is your url based on?
A fandom/media thing that I like
A name or nickname I go by
An inside joke
Something I like from real life (like an object or animal or something)
It's a descriptor of the kinds of things I post (like art or perhaps polls)
It's something that describes me
It's based on a phrase or quote
It's whatever first popped into my head, no real reason behind it
Other reason for it (tell me in the tags!)
show results